It’s cold, quiet and sad at times…
On the dark side, there’s silence – because it is easier not to upset the balance of things. It is also a place to wallow in pools of self-pity, or guilt-ridden rivers and often knowing that it is only by soaking in suffering that one contributes to another’s happiness.
But some despise this stance, citing passiveness, complacency, inaction as negative.
I could look to the four noble truths – not to become a monk, by any means, but rationale and perspective must have a place at the table. And though I agree in principle, it is too difficult to deny that some feelings are part of my blood, my soul – permanent, infinite, timeless.
…and I have known the most vivacious of emotions – raging fire, burning ice, torrential water, scorched earth…. and yet they are all tame when compared to the glow of the moon and a gentle, yet unassuming, spark in the dead of night. Stars peppering the heavens again… Such is the power it has over me.
Some things I will never know but am happy to dream of.
I’ve often said I am like Sysyphus, striving to fulfil expectations. Some of others, some of myself. But it’s just to get to the end of the day and a time of nothingness that seems to be enough for me.